Jesus in Disguise – Brandon Heath

Sometimes, we hurt.  Sometimes, we are blind to what is coming.  Sometimes, we are afraid.  In these moments, I usually think “God, where are you now?”  I feel as though he isn’t there, and I start to search for him.  The truth is that no matter how hard I search for a King that will “make it all better,” I won’t find Him.  Jesus is already here beside us, and he has a plan for us.

When I picture the search for God, I picture myself on my hands and knees searching the ground for my lost God that I can pick back up like I would my keys, or my glasses when the entire time God is the one holding the light above our heads to that we can search.

Jesus is present and acts in our lives, but we may not find our King sitting on a thrown, or laying in the dirt, waiting for us to find him.  Where we will find Christ is by our side, holding our hand, shining light into our lives.

“Jesus In Disguise”
Brandon Heath

[Verse 1:]
Ever get something in your head?
It’s nothing you heard
Or something you readEver had a cut but you never saw a blade?
Brought to your knees
But you never prayed

[Chorus:]
Jesus in disguise
Jehovah passing by
The burden of a tear
Hanging in your eye

Jesus in disguise
A scar across the sky
You were looking for a king
You would never recognize

Jesus in disgu-ah-hah-aah-ah-haa-ise

[Verse 2:]
Ever feel like you been somewhere before?
You hold the key
You know which door

Speak the word your lips have never known
Because your heart
Told you so

[Chorus:]
Jesus in disguise
Jehovah passing by
The burden of a tear
Hanging in your eye

Jesus in disguise
A scar across the sky
You were looking for a king
You would never recognize

Jesus in disgu-ah-hah-aah-ah-haa-ise

[Bridge:]
So open my eyes wide as I can
Blind as I am
Blind as I am

So open my eyes wide as I can
Blind as I am
Blind as I am

Jesus in disgu-ah-hah-aah-ah-haa-ise
Jesus in disgu-ah-hah-aah-ah-haa-ise
Jesus in disgu-ah-hah-aah-ah-haa-ise
(So open my eyes wide as I can
Blind as I am
Blind as I am)
Jesus in disgu-ah-hah-aah-ah-haa-ise
(So open my eyes wide as I can
Blind as I am
Blind as I am)

One Year

For those of you who don’t know, my wife, Amanda, and I have been married for one year today, having gotten married last year on October twelfth.  In the last year I have learned a lot about my wife and about my self, but most importantly, I have learned a lot about God. I have had several things that I have learned, and would love to share some of them with you here.

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Acknowledgment vs Dependence 

In church a couple of weeks ago, our pastor mentioned something that resonated with my marriage.  He was making the distinction between acknowledging God and his gift, and depending on them.  It is one thing to acknowledge the fact that God’s grace and mercy cover all, and quite another to depend on the true, relying on that Grace and mercy to make it into the next day.

This image has been furthered by my relationship with Amanda.  On our wedding day, we promised a whole host of wonderful things.  We promised things like: getting the bugs in the middle of the night, pushing each other to grow, and promising to love one another, unconditionally, forever.  On that day, we made these promises, we acknowledged that we would do these things together, and then we stepped into our marriage.  In the coming year, we had to transition from an acknowledgment to dependence: we are acting these promises out and relying on one another to do the same.  When I make mistakes, make a mess, forget to do something, do something wrong, I don’t need to worry because I know that Amanda will be there, she will love me no matter what.  I depend on that love when I make mistakes because without it I would constantly be fearful of doing wrong.

I picture that same type of love that God gives.  Even though I mess up on a daily bases, and I am not perfect, Gods love prevails.  I can depend on that love, clinging to it each day.

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I Am Not the Only Imperfect Human

This may sound silly, but sometimes, I feel as though I am the eternal mess up and that the people around me seem a thousand times better than  I am.  For example, one friend always seems to have the right answers to big questions, another seems to unfailingly read His Bible and Pray, constantly looking toward God, another friend never seems to argue with anyone, another has a heart for the meek and lowly, and goes out of her way to help them.  They all seem like great people, and great Christians.  Sure, they aren’t perfect, but they seem a whole lot better than I am at just about everything.

I used to have the same impression of my wife.  Sure, she wasn’t perfect, but she had so much good!  It used to seem like she always liked getting close to God, that she would do anything to help those in need, that she was always ready with a good answer to big questions.

Don’t get me wrong, I still thing that I have an amazing wife, but living alongside her for a year has opened my eyes to the fact that I am not any more messed up then everyone else.  We all wear faces, and show people the best side of ourselves, and when all we see are peoples good sides we think that we must be the only one that has a bad side.  I have learned that Amanda struggles to devote time to God, just as I do, that she does not know the answers to most big questions, just as I do, and that neither of us are perfect, and nor is anyone else.  God is perfect, and we are messed up human beings, but we are not alone in our mess, we have the mess of all those alongside us and Gods holy presence always alongside us!

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Saying I’m Sorry

Something that I heard a while ago was not to say I’m sorry, but instead to say thank you. The idea here is that when you say I’m sorry, the other person has to say that it’s okay or that it wasn’t that big of a deal, or something to that affect. If instead of saying “I’m sorry for messing up” we say “thank you for being patient with me” then we can recognize that we have done wrong, and praise them for their help and patients to overcome it.

I try to keep that mindset with Amanda, though I’m not as successful as I’d like, and having a similar mindset with God can be helpful. Don’t get me wrong, God loves to hear us say I’m sorry in true repentance. He forgives us every time we do. The problem is that we get stuck in this demoralizing rut where we keep apologizing and keep messing up. For your own sanity and for God’s glory, let ever apology lead to a gracious, thankful reminder of who God is.

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Amanda truly is an amazing, God-loving person.  She challenges me to grow closer to God, and teaches me new things about Him all the time (whether she knows it or not).  I am greatful that God has placed her in my life for the last year, and I am looking forward to what God has in store for me through her, and for us down the road.

The 6 things That You Probably Aren’t Doing

What popular right now?  Lists.  People read lists on social media, pastors use lists (that never seem to pass 3, but they are still lists all the same) and everyone loves a list.  The list doesn’t really need to be good, but if its a list, people will read it.  So, I have deceided to take all that I know and create a list of the 10 things that you are probably not doing that would make you a better person.

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1. Trusting God

It all starts with a complete trust in God.  We need to trust that he has complete  control over our futures and our lives.  He has a plan for us, and he will be there with us through it all.

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2. Trusting God

Next, we need to trust God.  We cannot half-heatedly trust God.  If I were to tell my wife “I trust you to do the dishes, but then looked over her shoulder as she did them, checked every dishes as she put it in the drainer, and then went back and cleaned all of them again after she was done,constantly worried that she won’t do a good enough job, we could probably agree that I was not truly trusting her.

Why do we do the same thing with God.  We say that we trust him but then worry that He won’t take care of us.

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3. Trusting God

We also nee  to trust God.  There are two types of trust that God deserves.  First, He is trustworthy because He is our ultimate authority.  Little children trust their parents because they are their parents.  The second type of trust is an earned trust.  When we make friends we give them our trust because they earn it by being their for us every step of the way leading up to that moment.

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4. Trusting God

We need to let that trust bleed into every area of our lives.  Are you worried?  Are you afraid?  Then you are probably not really trusting God.

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5. Trusting God

Once we are trusting God, what naturally follows is obedience. When I went ice-skating with my wife (a very experienced skater) and I was spending more time than I would like on my butt, I trusted her advice and did what she said because I knew that she knew better than I did.  God has a lot more experience with this life-thing than we do.  He knows how to be the best you can be, and stay on your feet.  If we trust Him, we will obey Him.

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6. Trusting God

Hopefully by now you have realized that Trusting God is pretty important.  I feel like I do not do it anywhere near as much as I should.  What can we do to trust God perfectly?  What are the first steps?  I honestly don’t have a good answer to that.  All that I have done, I still feel like I could be trusting in Him more. My best advice comes in two parts:

1) trust Him with others.  It is easier to trust in God when others can encourage you and keep you accountable.

2) Remember that God’s Grace does not depend on us being perfect.  Trusting in Him is a difficult task, and it is not likely something that you will ever perfect.  All we can do is to strive to do our best, and trust that God will forgive us, even when we don’t seem to trust Him.

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My Duty. My Prayer.

As I was reading through some quotes and scriptures given to me at a small groups retreat, I wrote this prayer, expounding on my failings, my struggles, and the glory of God.

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My duty is to make my soul happy in you, God.

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My Duty 

Its not something I can do half-heartedly.  If God is as important to me as I say He is, I will make this THE priority.  Not just a priority, but THE priority.

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Is to Make

This is a verb set.  As such, it is something that I must do.  It won’t just come to me, I won’t just find myself in it.  It is something that I must do.

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My Soul Happy

This does not mean that it is something that will always make me happy. it does not necessarily involve bible reading, prayer, or other “spiritual” things.  What it does necessitate is rejoicing in Jesus Christ, recognizing that God is soverign over me, has a plan for me, and that “His son” is the only identity I need, and allow the Holy Spirit to move my heart and guide my every thought back to Christ.

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In You, God

Whether I feel like I am succeeding or not, God is still God and is worthy of our praise.  I am lost, fallen, human, but He is the most high King, lord of lords, and lord over me.

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My Duty is to Make My Soul Happy In You, God.

 

 

 

 

Star Trek, Christ, and A Better Self

Recently, I was reading an interesting post comparing two canons of ideas.  The concept intrigued me.  This is their concluding paragraph:

The whole argument between the two canons comes down to this.  Should we be striving for a better world, one where people work to better themselves, rather than earn a paycheck?  Or should we be improving ourselves in preparation for a wholly different, probably perfect, world beyond our senses?  These are, I think, the defining questions of our time.  This is also why everyone should be reading their Bibles and watching their Star Trek.

The concept was odd, but a different way of looking at things.  For those of you who don’t know, in the Star Trek Universe, money is not usually the driving force, and, instead, people act for the betterment of themselves and man-kind.  The intriguing part though, was what the author posed against the Star Trek ideology claiming it to be the Christian ideology.  As Christians are we “improving ourselves in preparation for a wholly different, probably perfect, world beyond our senses?”  Is that the goal of the Christian life?  Is that our driving force?  I hope not.  I hope that our driving force, as Christians, is a desire to please God, and do his will, regardless if that means pastoring a church, running a business, working at a charity, or living abroad.  We will better ourselves by working for God, but working for God is not merely a tool to better ourselves.

 

You Love Me Anyway

This song is a great reminder of our sinfulness, God’s grace, and his love.  It calls us to remember all of those things that we have done.  Whether it be a silly little lie, major doubt, or anything else keeping us from God, he always extends his loving hand to say “I Love you”.

The bride is particularly powerful:

I am a thorn in Your crown
But You love me anyway
I am the sweat from Your brow
But You love me anyway
I am the nail in Your wrist
But You love me anyway
I am Judas’ kiss
But You love me anyway

Here we are reminded that not only are we keeping ourselves from God, but also that we are the reason that he died.  I am the reason that the reason that blood dripped from his crown.  I am the reason that the nails were driven through his wrists and he was hung up on that cross.  The last couple lines hit me the hardest.  Not only am I the reason that he had to die, but I am the one that put him there.  We all are.  We are all so imperfect, so fragile, so sinful, so unworthy of love, might as well the love of the all powerful creator of the universe.  That is the power of God’s grace.

We remember that God is all powerful and that he can create the entire universe.  Yet sometimes, I feel as though his most difficult task is forgiving us, but he loves us anyway.

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“You Love Me Anyway”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8BBCYFAYRI

Sidewalk Prophets

The question was raised
As my conscience fell
A silly, little lie
It didn’t mean much
But it lingers still
In the corners of my mind

Still you call me to walk
On the edge of this world
To spread my dreams and fly
But the future’s so far
My heart is so frail
I think I’d rather stay inside

[Chorus:]
But You love me anyway
It’s like nothing in life that I’ve ever known
Yes, You love me anyway
Oh, Lord, how You love me
How You love me

It took more than my strength
To simply be still
To seek but never find
All the reasons we change
The reasons I doubt
And why do loved ones have to die?

[Chorus:]
But You love me anyway
It’s like nothing in life that I’ve ever known
Yes, You love me anyway
Oh, Lord, how You love me

[Bridge:]
I am a thorn in Your crown
But You love me anyway
I am the sweat from Your brow
But You love me anyway
I am the nail in Your wrist
But You love me anyway
I am Judas’ kiss
But You love me anyway

See now, I am the man who yelled out from the crowd
For Your blood to be spilled on this earth shaking ground
Yes then I turned away with the smile on my face
With this sin in my heart tried to bury Your grace
And then alone in the night I still called out for You
So ashamed of my life, my life, my life

[Chorus:]
But You love me anyway
Oh, God, how you love me
Yes, You love me anyway
It’s like nothing in life that I’ve ever known
Yes, You love me anyway
Oh, Lord, how You love me
Yes, You love me,
Yes, You love me
Yes, You love me,
Yes, You love me
How You love me
How You love me
How You love me

When we are NOT attacked – the case of Youtube comments

Recently, I was watching a Christian YouTube video, and as is common on these types of videos, the comments host a debate for and against Christianity.  Usually, the comments that we read accuse Christianity of a lot of different things and then the Christians reply about how they know people who are not like that, and so on and so forth the cycle continues.

On this video, I read this comment that was praised by many of the Christians with other comments:

“One of the few Christians that are kind?,lol The majority of Christians are kind. When we are NOT attacked for our beliefs.”

What do you think?  Was this comment an accurate description of Christianity?

Unfortunately, I believe that it is. We have become a people that are kind when others are friendly to us and don’t attack us.  This is unfortunate because it is in such a big contradiction to the most kind act ever done by Jesus himself when he died on the cross for the very people that put him there.  I know that it is not easy.  Jesus knows it is not easy.  But we are not called to be kind when we are NOT attacked.  We are called to be kind ALWAYS!  Even when we disagree, even when we are insulted, even when we are attacked, we are still called to be kind.

Think about this next time you are hidden behind your username and feel the need to reply to the sinister comments:  “Out of 100 men, one will read the Bible, the other 99 will read the Christian.” – D.L. Moody

Daily Resolve

Resolve, the firm determination to do something, is the root of resolution. Why don’t we, then, have seem to keep our new years resolution? Some firm determination, huh? I think the reason that we seem to do so poorly is because we are going about it all wrong. Usually we insist that we “need to try harder” or we “just need to stick with it”. This year, why don’t we try something different: Let us depend on God every day to show us the next step, to push us further, and to stick with it longer. When it is God that is guiding us, every resolution is easier to keep.

House of Their Dreams

I have come to really like this song.  I think there are a lot of songs that point out just how isolated that we have become.  There are even some really good songs that show us a life or a family turning around because of Christ.  What makes this song any different?  For me, it is the fact that nothing is ever fixed.  The song tells of the brokenness in the family and of how it seems like everything is falling apart, and then the good part.  Nothing is miraculously fixed, it isn’t a “we’ve got Christ so we have it all figured out” but instead tells of how the family is broken and they fall on their knees, knowing that they are broken and ask God to save their family.  That is more like real life than what we usually see.  And in their brokenness, we see togetherness.  In this case, we see that the prayer is already starting to be answered when the tears pour down their face and the family comes before God together.

“House Of Their Dreams”
Casting Crowns

A corner office was his dream
More like a prison now it seems
Somewhere on the corporate climb
He left his warrior behind
Now he’s just a worker at a daily grind
Steals his years and numbs his mind
His strength is fading, his dreams are blind
This is not the life he had in mind

She lies awake cause he’s up all night
Staring at a screen that tells him lies
That the grass is greener on the other side
So she’s at the gym fighting off the years
To be young again and calm her fears
That she’ll never be enough for him
Just as a young man catches her eyeNow they’re trapped in their own worlds, in their own wars
With their cell phones and the closed doors
It’s funny how quiet and peaceful that it seems
But they’re all alone together
In the house of their dreams

Little sister, she’s a sixteen-year-old princess
Lost somewhere between the swing set
And her brand new crush’s chariot awaits
And big brothers rooms glowing with trophies that shout his name
But he’d trade all his high school fame
For some backyard catch with his hero again

So now they’re all dressed up in Sunday best
Sit up straight just like the rest
And they sing the songs of peace and rest that Jesus freely gives
And then their kids look up as daddy stands
And he takes his bride with trembling hands
Brother kneels at his father’s side as princess looks in the mothers eyes
Their tears tear down the walls as daddy prays

Were trapped in our own worlds and our own wars
With our cell phones and our closed doors
God, only You can save our family
And on this Rock, well build
On this Rock, well build
The house of our dreams

Scheduled.

I have found that I am very interconnected with my daily and weekly schedule.  I might wake up at 8, have breakfast at 9, have class at 10, have lunch at 11, have class at 1, have practice at 3, and the day goes on, each event rushing me to be done and run on to the next.

We set up a specific time for everything that we do, and that includes God.  We take God and make him fit into our schedule.  Sometimes that means that he gets a spot on Sunday mornings.  Other times, he may even have an allotted time every morning and every night, and at our lunch break.  That sound like a wonderful way to give every free second that you have to God…

This may sound radical, but I think God doesn’t want us to give Him our chunks of time.  He doesn’t want us to schedule Him in to our day.  He wants us.

What would it look like if we gave God ourselves 100% instead of giving him our time?  I think that it would really change the way that we lived our lives and the way that we interact with God.  I don’t think that we would ever not have enough time for God, because all of our time would be His.  We would not need to try to fit Him in among the other things that we are doing, but instead, He will be part of all of those other things.

Now don’t get me wrong, I think that there are some things that we can do and in fact should do that will are beneficial to that relationship.  Reading your bible, church, bible study, prayer meetings, etc are all great things that help us as we yearn to become more filled with Jesus; we are still a Christian even if we have done none of them and are not excused from living a life for Christ even if we don’t go to church.

This concept is embodied in the commonly used saying “we are human BEings not human DOings.”  Is isn’t that we don’t do things for God, just that what we do is not and should not be the essence of who we are in God.